Turnabout Ice Cream
by Lauren Order
Summary: Phoenix reluctantly agrees to go for ice cream with the Feys.  With Pearl there, this innocent trip turns into a big adventure that leads to court when 3 characters get prosecuted by everyone's least favorite security guard!
1. Chapter 1

This is my first story. I hope it is a good one. Many of these things are beyond possibility, but isn't that what stories are for? Please R&R.

**Attention**: I don't own any of these characters. I have to just put this disclaimer so Edgeworth doesn't come after me for plagiarism.

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**Turnabout Ice Cream**

Chapter 1

_(Steel samurai ring tone plays)_

"Huh?" Phoenix Wright woke up in a daze to find that his cell phone was ringing. He also found that he had fallen asleep on the couch in the lobby of Wright and Co. Law Offices… again. Of course, as you may or may not know, our hero Nick Wright doesn't get too much money from his clients. Because he is so poor, he lives in his office. That's right; he DOES have a refrigerator in there, too.

So anyway, Nick answered his cell phone. "Mia… what the?! How the heck can you call me? You're dead!" said Nick after hearing Mia's voice over the phone. "Nick!! You IDIOT! I am NOT Mia, I'm Maya. Isn't that obvious?" Maya answered. "Uh…sorry?" Nick said sheepishly. "Now then, for your clumsiness, you will take us for ice cream." Maya commanded. "Us?" "Yeah, Pearly and me! Okay, see you in a bit!" "Uh wait a minute… HOLD IT!" Nick cried, but it was too late. Maya already hung up. _Darn. I can't even drive them there. What'll I do now?_ Nick thought.

Then, all of a sudden: _beep beep! _Someone pulled up in a Ferrari. "Maya? Since when do you have a Ferrari? And since when can you drive?" Nick asked. "Nick!! You IDIOT! I am NOT Maya, I'm Mia. Isn't that obvious?" Mia said. "Oh yeah, huh," said Nick while he was thinking, _Déjà vu!_ Now that he got a better look, it was Mia in the driver's seat, being channeled by Maya. Good thing that Mia knew his secret that he couldn't drive.

"Hop in, Phoenix," Mia said. He did, and then Mia drove to the gourmet ice cream shop. When they got there, Pearl yelled, "I scream, you scream, we all scream for… ooh it all looks so good!" She then proceeded to order everything on the menu.

"HOLD IT!" Nick shouted. "I've been here before. You just order whatever you want and you just assume 'He's the lawyer, he'll pay for it!' Well, let me tell you, I'm poor! I live in my office, for crying out loud! I won't settle for this. By the way, how much does this stuff cost- OBJECTION!" Nick's jaw dropped. One ice cream cone with one scoop was $20.00! "We are taking our business elsewhere. Mia, TAKE THAT!" Nick shouted as he threw the car keys at her.

So they all took off in the Ferrari in search of cheaper ice cream. While they were driving, Pearl said, "Does something smell around here?" "Come to think of it, it does," said Mia. Nick thought, _But when something smells, it's usually the…_ He was cut off by the tinny music of an ice cream truck. Lo and behold, an ice cream truck sped by them. The driver was none other than: _Butz_. Nick finished his thought. Yes, it appeared that Larry Butz's new job was driving an ice cream truck.

"Come on, Mystic Mia! Drive faster. We have to catch up to that ice cream truck!" Pearl shouted. "I'm driving as fast as I can. Wait a minute… how is he beating us? We're in a Ferrari!" Mia said. "Forget this; I'm running," Pearl said as she jumped out of the speeding Ferrari. "Pearls, HOLD IT!" Nick shouted, but it was too late. She was running at her top spirit medium speed, which was faster than a speeding Ferrari.

She jumped on the back of Larry's truck, causing him to spin out of control. He was sent careening through an intersection and into a car. "Hey kid, what the heck did you do that for?" Larry shouted. "Hey, you're Mr. Nick's friend, right?" asked Pearl. "Huh? You mean you know Nick?" At that moment, Mia pulled up alongside the accident. Phoenix jumped out of the car.

"Larry, what did you do this time?" he asked. "Yo Nick!" Larry shouted through gritted teeth. "Help me out here. This kid jumped on my truck, and now this crazy old lady I hit is threatening to prosecute me!" "Crazy old lady?" Mia said. "You whippersnappers! I may be old, but not crazy!" a voice shouted. "O-Oldbag?" Nick realized this lady could not get any older or crazier, for she was Wendy Oldbag, a notoriously talkative witness. This meant trouble.

Dick Gumshoe pulled up in a cop car. She must have called the police before. "Hey, pal. What's the big idea?" he said. "This young un' tried to kill me, he did," said Oldbag. "Harry Butz? Yeah, you're that weirdo from Mr. Wright's first case," said Gumshoe. "Hey! Who ya callin' a weirdo!?" screamed Larry. "Get me a prosecutor, whippersnapper!" Oldbag told Gumshoe. "Y-yes ma'am! Right away!" Gumshoe replied. He drove off in search of a prosecutor.

He returned shortly after. He was speeding, however, and could not stop in time. BOOM! He crashed into the wreckage of Oldbag's car. "I'm okay!" Gumshoe announced as he stepped out of the busted cop car. "The same cannot be said for Ms. Oldbag's car, however," said a mysterious voice. It came from the person who just pulled up on a motorcycle. The person took off their helmet. "Miles Edgeworth, at your service. Someone needed a prosecutor?" he said.

"Yes, Edgey-poo! It was me! Help me out. These whippersnappers tried to kill me with their antics!" said Oldbag. "Ugh. Not you again. Will you just leave me alone?" Edgeworth said. "What happened anyway?" he asked. "It was an accident! I swear." Larry pleaded. "This kid jumped on my truck and I went out of control into Oldhag's car." "And I was just driving and I hit the accident by accident," said Gumshoe.

"Very well. I always wanted to try my hand at being a defense attorney," Edgeworth said. "Huh?" everyone else said at the same time. "I will be defending Dick Gumshoe for his trial," Edgeworth announced. "Then I will defend Larry Butz in his trial," Phoenix declared. "Yo Nick! Thanks!" Larry cried. "I guess that means I'll defend Pearly in her trial. Even though I'm DEAD!" Mia glared at Nick. "Sorry, that's the way it works!" said Edgeworth. "You're on your own, Oldbag." And with that, Edgeworth pushed Oldbag off a nearby cliff.

Down, down, down she fell. She was about to hit the ground when BOING! She bounced off a familiar rotund shape. "Ah-hem! Who are you? My name is Marvin Grossberg, attorney at law," the rotund one said. "Can you prosecute, whippersnapper?" Oldbag asked. "Well, I'm not a whippersnapper, but as for prosecuting… I don't see why not. As long as you pay the price!" Grossberg said. "I don't care what I have to pay, just find those kids guilty!" ordered Oldbag. "All right then…" Grossberg then shouted his battle cry- what he says in court instead of "objection": "SUPER SIZE ME!!!!"

**To be continued….**


	2. Chapter 2

Wow. This chapter might be a bit confusing with Maya/Mia, but the rest is great! Be sure to remember Grossberg's catch phrase.

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**Turnabout Ice Cream**

Chapter 2

It was Day One. Investigation. Not that it needed a title at this point, but the annoying typewriter letters came up anyway.

Phoenix had no idea how he was going to win this trial. It was a strange trial, indeed. Three defendants, three defense attorneys, and possibly three prosecutors. He had to find clues, and fast. He decided to start by asking Gumshoe for an autopsy report.

Then he remembered two things: no one died, and Gumshoe was at the detention center. Oh well, he would just have to find some other clues. He decided to go to the scene of the crime- the intersection where it happened.

Phoenix was used to getting exciting murder cases, and nothing like this boring accident case. He thought he should prove that it was an accident, because he was sure the prosecution was going to say that the crash was on purpose.

He was hoping Franziska Von Karma was not going to prosecute in this trial, but it was possible, and very likely, with his luck. How could he prove that Larry was just a dumb person who ran into a car? He was hoping it would be easier than it seemed.

Meanwhile, Edgeworth was conducting his own investigation at the crash site already. Since Gumshoe was not available, he hired his own investigator. He chose Ema Skye. He mostly chose her because he could pay her in bottles of Luminol fluid and fingerprinting kits. He also forgot how annoying she was.

"Hey, Mr. Edgeworth? Since I'm going to have to bring these files back to your office, can I just hang out there for a while with you? You know, if you need help on anything. Or if you just want to talk over tea!" Ema rambled on. "We'll talk about that later. Right now, I need the DNA test completed," Edgeworth replied.

"Right. Can I call you Miles? I like that better than Mr. Edgeworth," Ema asked. "I don't care. Do anything you want, just _finish the investigation_, or so help me, I will never talk to you again!" Edgeworth commanded. "NOOO!" Ema cried and went straight back to work.

At the same time, Mia was investigating what happened through Pearl. She was being channeled by Maya, and she was interrogating Pearl. "Tell me the truth. Were you _really _getting a Samurai Ice Pop? Or were you going to get something else? Come on, fess up!!!" Mia could be very scary at times.

"Mystic Mia, I told the truth! You can even use my magatama. I have no psyche- locks," Pearl said. She was on the verge of tears at this point.

"I'm afraid the truth just isn't enough. Pearly, you will tell me what I want to hear right now!" Mia screamed at the poor little girl.

"But first, we're getting some burgers!" Mia said. "Whoa, where did that come from? Could it be that Maya actually learned to stay conscious during her channeling? Maybe…" Mia trailed off, lost in thought.

Pearl took this chance and ran for it, only to be stopped by the detention center security guard, who moved for the first time in 25 years. "Oh well, there goes the interrogation," Mia said. "Time for some burgers!" She headed to the local burger joint.

As she walked into the burger joint, she didn't notice her former mentor, Marvin Grossberg, leaving. Of course, this was because Maya was overcome with hunger and stopped channeling Mia.

This brings us back to Grossberg's story. He had just enjoyed a satisfying super-sized burger meal, and was ready to get back to work. That annoying Oldbag had called him 20 times so far in 2 hours.

He had to explain to her how he couldn't work as fast as he used to in the lemon-scented days of his youth. She still didn't get it. _How complicated is it to understand fresh lemon scent and youth in the same sentence?_ he thought.

He gathered his documents together. Something immediately struck him as he was reading the reports. "What's this?" he said to himself. "This proves to be a contradiction! These people are innocent!"

Then he realized that he wasn't a defense attorney anymore. He was a prosecutor. He had to prove them guilty. "How can I prove them guilty if they're innocent? That's it! I'll use reverse psychology on the judge and then he'll give a 'guilty' verdict," Grossberg said.

"Or I'll just have to prepare the witnesses to lie about every detail… ha ha ha!" Grossberg started laughing maniacally. Then he started to cough. "Cough, cough…. Ahh-hhem!"

"Oldbag will be pleased… maybe she'll even give me an extra McDollar or two!" Grossberg started to fantasize about all the combinations of Big Macs and drinks and fries. Then he got to work.

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Oh no! Is it hopeless for our favorite defense? Will Grossberg get his gross burgers? Will Ema's dream of being with Edgeworth be fulfilled? Will Pearl reach her breaking point? Stay tuned to find out.


	3. Chapter 3

**Turnabout Ice Cream**

Chapter 3

Finally, they all made it to court the next day. The judge presiding was none other than the clueless one, Udgey. For some reason, his robes were soaking wet.

"Is the prosecution ready?" the judge asked.

"Ah-hem! Indeed I am," Grossberg replied, jamming a burger into his mouth after speaking.

"Is the defense prepared?" the judge then asked.

"Yes, your honor," three voices said at the same time. The three voices were Phoenix, Edgeworth, and Maya as Mia. They had a hard time fitting behind the desk.

"Uh, just one question, though. Why are your robes all wet? And your beard is soaking wet, too," Phoenix asked.

"Oh, that? That's just from my swim meet today with Damon Gant. The county jail sure has a nice swimming pool!" the judge replied.

"You… swim in your … robes?" Edgeworth asked calmly.

"Well, I'm a judge! What do you think I swim in?" the judge said.

"Maybe a bathing suit?" Mia said sarcastically.

"Ah-hem! This is beside the point. I have multiple consistent testimonies to prove the three defendants guilty," Grossberg interjected.

Everyone glanced over at the defendant's stand. Three people were crammed into the small space. It was more crowded than the defense's desk. It was mostly Gumshoe taking up the space.

"Yes, the prosecution may continue with the opening statements," said the judge.

"This case is concerning the well-being of Ms. Wendy Oldbag. She has repeatedly accused the three defendants of endangering her life and damaging her car in the process. She demands at least $1,000,000 or a jail sentence for these 'whippersnappers' as she calls them," Grossberg concluded.

"What about the little girl? She doesn't belong here. She must be innocent," the judge asked.

"Ms. Oldbag insists that all whippersnappers are alike, and they are all to be punished for their misdeeds."

"All right then. Your first witness, Mr. Edge- I mean Mr. Grossberg?" the judge commanded.

"The first witness the prosecution calls to the stand is Officer Mike Meekins, who was off duty at the time. He states that he was at the donut shop seeking personal advice from the clerk when he witnessed the crash across the street." Grossberg explained.

"Very well then," the judge replied.

Mike Meekins came to the stand. "Your name and occupation, witness? Oh, I just love saying all these prosecutor phrases!" Grossberg exclaimed.

Meekins shouted into his megaphone, saying, "My name is Mike Meekins, sir! My occupation is a police officer! This place looks familiar, sir! Have I been here before?!"

"I believe you have, although I can't remember why…" the judge said. "Anyway, begin your testimony!"

Then Meekins proceeded to explain what had happened. His details were a bit fuzzy as usual, so Phoenix pointed out some contradictions and Edgeworth had the evidence. Mia was particularly good at pressing him for more information.

"What a weak testimony, pal. I could do better any day. You're insulting to the police force." Gumshoe kept insulting Meekins, hoping he would just go away.

Then, Meekins did go away. It was time for the next witness.

"I call for a ten minute recess from the court." The judge pounded his gavel and everyone exited to the defendant's lobby.

Angel Starr showed up. "Hey, you folks look like you could use some lunch! How about some flame-broiled burgers?"

Immediately, both prosecution and defense shouted, "YES!"

Everyone, that is, except Edgeworth. He was a vegetarian, and he was busy. Ema was talking to him.

"Miles, I'm really amazed at what you can do with the evidence I gave you. I could never be a lawyer," Ema sighed.

"It's nothing. Really. I wish they never gave me that stupid King of Prosecutors trophy. Still, even though you wouldn't be a great lawyer, you will become an amazing scientific investigator. In fact, I think you already are," Edgeworth said.

"Really? You mean it?" Ema asked.

"Yes, I mean it. Really." Edgeworth was getting nervous. She looked… strange.

She leaned in closer to him. And closer. And then she kissed him.

"Sorry, Mr. Edgeworth! Sorry!" Ema started yelling. "I… couldn't help it."

Edgeworth just stood there. He was perplexed. Could it be… that was actually- pleasant?

Court was about to reconvene. They all headed back to the courtroom for some more boring testimony-busting.

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To be continued… thanks to all the readers for staying with the story. This chapter was a little vague, but I had to add in the Edgeworth x Ema! Will be back with another chapter soon.


	4. Chapter 4

**Turnabout Ice Cream**

Chapter 4

"Court is now back in session," said the judge. "May the prosecution call the next witness to the stand?"

"Ah. Erm. Yes. About that… the next witness is rather… busy," Grossberg said.

"This is a court of law! What could be more important than that?" Udgey asked.

"How about another court of law? The next witness is currently in another trial right now," Grossberg explained nervously.

"Well, who could that be?" the judge asked, stating the obvious question in everyone's mind.

"Uh-" Grossberg was interrupted by a crash as the courtroom doors were thrown open.

"YOU FOOL! How dare you interrupt me from a perfectly perfect case that I was winning? I have no time for this foolish case of yours!"

"Uh-oh. Franziska? This is not good," Phoenix said. "What are you talking about, Nick? She's hot!" Larry said.

"No! Larry, you don't understand. Don't get her mad." "Why not? Hey, Fran! Are your legs tired? 'Cuz you've been running through my mind all day!"

Everything went silent.

"FOOOOOOL!" Franziska shrieked. She started whipping Larry at the rate of 20 lashes per second.

Larry had tears in his eyes when she stopped. "I was saving that one for someone as pretty as you. I read it off a fortune cookie…" Then he collapsed.

"Ah-HEHM! Could you please take the stand, Ms. von Karma?" Grossberg said.

"Fine. Just get this over with. And no more fools," Franziska commanded.

"Your name and occupation, please?" asked Grossberg.

"I am Franziska von Karma, and I am the most perfect of prosecutors," she said.

"Now, apparently, you witnessed the accident- er- crime, correct?" Grossberg asked.

"Yes, I did. I will now say the testimony. You will listen.

"They are guilty. All of them. I saw it because it was right across the street from my house. The girl jumped on the truck and the foolish- looking man crashed into that annoying old lady. Then the scruffy detective crashed into the wreck. That is all. Goodbye, fools!"

Franziska proceeded to give every person in the courtroom a whipping on her way out. "Nick! She called me a foolish- looking man! I don't deserve this world anymore!" Larry cried.

"Well! I guess you'll just have to cross- examine the statements because Ms. von Karma left so abruptly," the judge said.

"Very well. There is evidence that it was not Larry's, Pearl's, or Gumshoe's fault for the crash," Edgeworth said.

"Here you go, Mr. Edgeworth!" Ema gave him a box full of evidence. She was grinning like a madman.

"Are you ok, kid?" asked Mia. "Yeah, I'm fine," Ema said.

"Anyway! Two things were discovered. One was the fact that Larry Butz's truck was damaged beyond repair before the accident. The other was a set of fingerprints belonging to none other than- Mike Meekins!"

Everyone gasped.

Phoenix then said, "I know! This must be an elaborate murder plot! Meekins must have shot someone, then flew by a rope above the truck, went inside the trunk, then damaged all the parts with a statue. And he stole my cell phone!"

"Phoenix? I'm ashamed to be your mentor. Good thing I'm dead. Nice try, but those crazy theories won't work this time," Mia said.

"This is most perplexing. I think we had better bring Officer Meekins back in for a better testimony- and an alibi," said the judge.

"Good idea! And get me a happy meal while you're at it!" Grossberg yelled.

"OBJECTION! I object to your tenth lunch break!" Phoenix shouted.

"My dear boy, why do you think I'm never in my office? It's because I'm _always_ on a lunch break!"

"I declare a ten minute recess… again!" the judge said, pounding his gavel.


End file.
